It’s graduation time in New England and since I haven’t done this in awhile I thought I would share my thoughts on what I would say if I was speaking to the graduating class of 2024. I did this a few years ago when I was writing a column for the New Bedford Standard Times.
This is the time of year when you might find stories or videos online of what people are saying in commencement speeches around the country. Some will go viral for their views (Harrison Butker of the KC Chiefs). Others for their common sense like Admiral William McRaven who, in 2014, told the graduating class at the University of Texas that if you make your bed in the morning you have already accomplished something before the rest of your day begins.
“If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right. And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made—that you made—and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better. If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.”
What would I say if I was standing at a podium with hundreds of graduates in front of me? While I don’t have one theme for my imaginary speech I did think of a few things this week that I would like to say.
Never lose that spark that makes you… you! What is it that sets you apart from everyone else? Is it a talent or the way you care for others? Things will happen as you ease into adulting that will challenge you and , at times, make it difficult to stay true to your feelings and beliefs. Don’t lose sight of who you are and what you believe in. Never stop learning and improving but don’t lose sight of who you are.
Please don’t wake up in the morning determined to tick someone off today. I actually know more than one person who has actually said, “Let’s see who I can piss off today!” Why? We face enough issues everyday why do we have to deal with people who consider it a sport to antagonize? I was never a person that ever considered that “fun.” Mom once told me, “If you have nothing good to say than say nothing.”
Make it a habit to put your phone down or put it away entirely. I’ve been guilty of this myself. You’re having a conversation with someone but you have your phone right near you and you keep seeing notifications. The curious part of you looks to see who it’s from. Of course, that takes your attention away from the person you were talking to.
Do you realize what a message it sends when someone is talking to you and they have your total attention? Have you had someone give you their total time and attention? It feels great!
Call your mom. And your dad if they’re both part of the picture. I realize that each family situation is different and I’m not going to pretend to know what yours might be. However, I just know, from experience, that the day will come where you want to share some news or ask for some advice and you won’t be able to make that call. Cherish it while you still can.
Learn to get over it. Things happen. To everyone. You can’t dwell on it. If you do it will consume you and effect everything else in your life. Learn to move on. Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this situation?” Sometimes the only answer is to not do that again.
When things seem overwhelming just focus on what’s right in front of you or what’s next. Life can get so busy and there will be times when you will worry that you just can’t get it all done. It took me a few years to learn to just focus on what you have to do next. Just take it one step at a time. Worrying about ALL the things you have to do will not help you get them done at all but, if you just chip away, you might get to the end of the day and think, “Wow! I did it!”
And finally….
Keep doing good things even when no one is watching. I do see a lot of good in this world. Some days you have to really look for it but it’s there. There will always be people that do good things for the accolades they receive but is that really the point? Why not become someone that helps a friend, neighbor or stranger just because they need it or it’s the right thing to do? Trust me, it gives you a fantastic feeling and just feeling that yourself is enough.
Congratulations to the class of 2024! The future awaits and I can’t wait to see what you do with it.
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