This week I had a chance to catch up with one of my fellow “softball dads.” We hadn’t seen each other in probably seven or eight years when our daughters played for a travel team. I started to think about how it’s time for a reunion.
Looking back over the years I realized how much time we all spend together. Just about every weekend from May to August you keep running into each other either at a game or practice. There’s also off-season batting practice where some parents volunteer to help or you at least see each other in the parking lot.
Once the tournaments start you can spend the whole weekend with the group especially if you’re staying at a hotel away from home or hosting a tournament. There are team dinners and activities and if the team is playing well you can be at the ballpark from 7 a.m. to 4 or 5 p.m. or even later. You get to know each other and friendships develop and then….before you know it… it’s over. Your child ages out or graduates and the thing you all had in common comes to an end. Some of the parents I’m still in contact with but for some, like my friend Dave, you just never cross paths anymore.
We reunited this week because Dave has his own business doing carpentry and finish work. My wife, Priscilla, had a few projects she wanted done around the house and my days on a ladder are just a distant memory now. I had seen a post on Facebook about Dave so we called. (BTW – excellent work. Reach out to me if you’d like to know more.)
It’s been so nice reconnecting this week and finding out what our girls are up to now. I mentioned my idea of a reunion and he was all for it. Then he said even if it’s just the parents that would be fine. I was thinking it would be so nice to see the girls too but his comment made me realize there were two different groups there every week: the players and us. Plus it might be difficult to get some of the girls together as they all have lives, jobs, some have spouses, some have children and they’re scattered all over the place. I think most of the parents are still local.
That’s one of the many side effects of youth sports. I’ve always felt that it’s more than just your child wanting to play a game. If done well, they learn life skills, make friendships, and learn how to work together with others to accomplish a goal.
I’ve worked some tournaments since my own kids stopped playing and I wonder sometimes if these young parents have any idea what the next few years are going to be like. The good times and the tough times. There will be tough losses, injuries, bad calls and uncomfortable rides home. However, there will also be incredible plays, plenty of laughs and memories made. Dave and I both agreed that when you’re going through it you can’t believe how busy you are but, before you know it, it’s over and you miss it like crazy.
This was a great team we were very lucky to have been a part of. Great coaches, great families and, if memory serves me… no drama! That’s not always the case with these teams. There can be disagreements about coaching strategy or playing time for your child but I seem to remember things going smoothly. We trusted the coach and everyone seemed to know their role and what was expected. That goes for the players and the parents.
A few months ago I interviewed Dr. Robert Baldwin who is now in charge at the MIAA. He was talking about his time as a player, then coach and then parent. He mentioned how you may not remember the score of a certain game or your stats but you remember the experiences. I was reminded this week of the friendships that develop as we watch our children play. There’s no rule that says those times have to end once the children stop playing. I think it’s time we all get together again.
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