My 3-year old grandson continues to teach me lessons even though he’s 2,052 miles away.
I’ve mentioned this before how babies and toddlers live in the now. They are hungry NOW. They are tired NOW and whatever they want, they want it NOW! Young children don’t worry about the future or spend time living in the past, what there is of one. This came to light again this week.
In case you don’t know, my daughter Sarah and her family are now living in Corpus Christi, Texas. That’s where the Navy has sent my son-in-law for his next assignment. Liam and I FaceTime just about every day, usually when he’s sitting down to have his bagel. And I don’t mind it at all. We usually chit chat about random stuff like the how warm is it there or did you play in your new yard yet.
I noticed something this week: When I asked him what they did yesterday, he stared off into space and ended up asking, “Mom? What did we do yesterday?” At first I thought it was funny that he couldn’t remember but then I realized that he is so focused on what he’s doing now that he couldn’t remember what he did yesterday. He’s living in the moment not the past or the future. What a great gift! It’s not right in front of him so it’s not important. I know, he’s only three but I think this is cool!
How great would that be if we could be so focused on THIS moment that we don’t worry about anything else? It would alleviate a lot of anxiety. Wouldn’t it?
I have an appointment tomorrow because I need a root canal. Yeah, not thrilled. I have been thinking about this and dreading it for days now. If I could just adopt Liam’s way of thinking I wouldn’t think about it until the appointment arrives. Deal with it then and not let it drag me down.
I think about all the times in my life that I’ve either been stuck in the past or focused on something in the future that I didn’t enjoy where I was or who I was with at the moment. How many times have you been talking to someone but felt the need to check your phone while they were talking? Rather rude isn’t it? “Yeah I’m listening to you but let me see if there’s something else I need to know about right now.” What kind of message does that send?
Have you ever been with your kids but instead of being in the moment and participating in what they’re doing you are either on your phone or thinking about work? How about when your spouse is telling you about their day and you sit there playing Wordle going, “Uh huh. Yeah. I hear ya.”
Now I’m not saying we should never plan ahead or think about something we have to do in the future but I know, in my own life, there have been many times where I was not present. I have a whole new way of thinking when it comes to multitasking. I used to think I was such a busy person that I had to multitask or things would never get done. Since then I have realized that when you multitask you really aren’t giving anything your full attention and some things deserve your full attention. Especially loved ones. Is it better to give something only a portion of your focus and eventually get that job completed or should you do one thing completely and then move on to the next?
I know when I’m talking to my grandson I am the most important thing to him right at that moment and you know what? That feels pretty damn good! I know, he’s only three and I’m sure when he gets older and busier his attention may not always be on what’s in front of him. There will be school, sports, cars and girls to think about but I hope he never completely loses that focus.
For me I’m going to try and pay attention to my focus and try to keep it on what’s right in front of me at the moment. Don’t miss the sunset because you’re watching a stupid video that will be there later. Don’t ignore the people you’re with tonight because you’re worried about something tomorrow. And don’t miss out on what’s happening right now because your mind is stuck on how you used to do things in the past. The past is just that…past. Enjoy the memory but stop comparing.
That’s all for now. I think I’ll FaceTime my little buddy!
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